A Twisted Tale of Sexual Harassment
WARNING: If you are easily offended or don’t have a sense of humor, even on the not so pretty things in life this is not for you.
As I was typing last night I used the word harass as a playful comment and started thinking about the pronunciation of the word. No matter where you put the apostrophe when you say it, it will sound close enough to Her’ass unless you are saying it in the English form as Harris. Honestly, I like the other two (huh-rass) simply because I can point out “haha, you said her’ass!” just as I do with the word Uranus, Liqour and Banal, pronounced bayn-owl, but I’m sure you can guess how I say it.
When we think of harassment we almost always automatically think of Sexual Harassment and Women.
So what is the etymology of harassment? In the 1610s, from the French, harasser “tire out, vex,” possibly from Old French harer “set a dog on with a cry,” Was this dog female? perhaps blended with Old French harier “to harry, draw, drag” Originally “to lay waste, devastate,” sense of “distress” is from 1650s.
TWO Professionals, ONE broad…
The woman in the computer company Sencorp’s “Sexual Harassment” video is really hot, according to new employee Mark Smithers.
“Damn! She ‘da bomb!” Smithers said to fellow workmates who had taken fifteen minutes of their lunch break in order to watch the mandatory video. “I mean, check ‘er out! Damn!”
Katrina Brewer, the woman on the video, has really nice breasts and her eyes are sexier than hell.
“I’d like to get me some of that!” Smithers said.
“Sexual harassment has been a real problem here at Sencorp,” said Daniel Nordburg, CEO. “We thought it was time to educate our workers by using the video with the hot babe in it.”
Nordburg says that Sencorp has a “zero-tolerance” policy for sexual harassment, and that an employee can be fired after only three complaints.
“We want the broads here to feel safe,” said Nordburg. “No chick should come to work and have to put up with harassment.” Then, he pointed out that the word “harassment” sounds like “her ass-ment” and began to laugh.
Nordburg says that Smithers would have to answer for his conduct during the video, and that he would have to change his attitude when it came to “working with the honnies.”
“Those sweet-thangs don’t deserve such disrespect,” Nordburg says.
This, however, did not change the fact that the chick in the video was really hot.
“She can sexually harass me any day!” said Smithers.
-Hope you enjoyed this bit of comical satire that was ENTIRELY FICTITIOUS by SamIam
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P.S.Find more fictitious funny satire stories by clicking here and giving SamIam 5starsPlease note that HARASSMENT occurs everyday and can happen to anyone, anywhere. While we can laugh and joke about situations as the above story people should be aware of what’s right and wrong. If an uncomfortable situation occurs it should not be taken lightly. HARASSMENT covers a wide range of behaviors of an offensive nature. It is commonly understood as behavior intended to disturb or upset, and it is characteristically repetitive. In the legal sense, it is intentional behavior which is found threatening or disturbing. Sexual harassment refers to persistent and unwanted sexual advances, typically in the workplace, where the consequences of refusing are potentially very disadvantageous to the victim. IF THIS APPLIES TO YOU IN ANYWAY PLEASE SEEK HELP.
- Egypt police arrest sexual harassment killer (bikyamasr.com)
- KU opens office for harassment complaints (sfgate.com)
- Getting Sexually Harassed? There’s An App For That (clutchmagonline.com)
- Varsity students protest: We are being sexually harassed (vanguardngr.com)
- Lawsuit claims former city employee Paul Page sexually harassed city worker (timesfreepress.com)